the wes-man has a birthday

today i am finding myself very stricken with anxiety & worry & just nasty things. i think it's b/c of a few things: it's wes birthday & i want to do something GREAT for him & i am doing nothing but falling apart. another reason is that we are leaving for the weekend & i have to pack today & for some reason that is really stressing me out.

so my sister suggested doing something that relaxes me for awhile (among many other good ideas that she shared). so i'm looking at pictures of my babies. & crying & addy is stroking my cheek saying "oooh, mama, oooh" & i tell her mama's just sad & i will be better soon. & she says 'YEA! with a big smile' then i turn on a dvd & all is good with the girls. so here's to sharing some of the pictures that are making me feel that all is okay with the world today:

amelia getting her a mid-day bath due to playing in addy's potty full of pee.
adeline at about 10 1/2 months, sitting in the same sink getting a similar mid-day bath.

i go back & forth between thinking they don't have that much of a resemblance to thinking they could pass as twins. it depends on the hair, the day, & the faces they're making. you be your own judge...just don't tell me, b/c i have my own mama-mind made up & i'll say you are a fool if you disagree :o) lol. (told you i'm in a great mood)

amelia this past month. i believe this was sit-&-eat-strawberries evening.

addy with her grandpa bruce at about 10-11 months.
***
this is just one basket of strawberries we've picked this week. we're overflowing with berries & i hate to say it, but we've really been slacking on picking this past week (oh, due to many sessions of holding each other & crying?!) so we are finding a lot of rotten ones throughout the patch. *sigh* don't tell addy we've let some go rotten. she may decide to put us in time out...

this ever-so-wonderful investment: a water table. or as addy thinks, a wee little pool. this is often where we find her in the nude.

addy being her dare-devil-acrobatic self
***
& here's to the man of the day. wes! it's his birthday!
happy birthday, my love.

wes is just an amazing man. he has a tender heart. when i first met him & told my friends that although he was a republican (smile...no worries folks, i have switched him already to the correct end, lol) he had soft tender eyes, like what i would imagine jesus to have. he sees people for who they are & isn't quick to judge or place blame or look for excuses. he is a man of honesty & integrity & deep love. wes is always putting himself on the back burner for others, especially his family. he is so calm that sometimes it annoys me; you know, like get upset about something, for the love of it all! but he most often doesn't (although i am here for him if he does, of course) he is like a calm, crystal-clear, beautiful caribbean ocean. you are able to see through him to the bottom of his white, sandy ocean floor.

okay, enough of the silly metaphor (or would it be a simile? ugh, i despise grammar!). wes is just part of me, & he is my haven right now (but, 'haven' the word, i love). i love this guy!

wes with baby amelia, alive for 2 minutes.

wes helping adeline fish last summer

wes mowing the yard with adeline. huh, he just did this same thing with amelia yesterday.

***
my mom may just kill me if i do this, but i'm going to do it anyway. who can try to kill a daughter with a brain tumor?! (see, harold IS useful!). plus i think my mom should start her own blog & start writing to publish. so consider this my *push*, mom.

Wes, I did want to take an opportunity to tell you what I feel about you -- especially now with all that is going on in your life. If the measure of a man is what his responses are to life's gut wrenching issues, then you have been measured and found well built. If the measure of a man is in finding how much he makes the people around him in his life know that he loves them - you are found overflowing and wealthy. If the measure of a man is in how much his wife and children trust him because they have found him a trustworthy hiding place, a solace and firm anchor in any storm, then you have been found solid and sturdy and worthy of the load.

Hear this Wes Gerbick. Know that you have been measured and have surpassed the bar.

Wes, I have always loved you not only just because of who you are, but also because of the tender yet firm love you show my daughter and now granddaughters. To know when Heidi needs you most that she KNOWS she can rest in you because you are her Jesus here on earth, that makes me fall before God and beg him to protect you. You have been presented a task that many men would walk - no run - away from, either physically walk or mentally walk, and yet you are solidly honorable in your loyalty and your love and your protection of those that God has given into your care. I cannot tell you with earthly words what that does to my soul, what that does to my most tender mother's heart, how my mother's eye sees that, but in heaven God will give us words to communicate that easily, so accept this clumsy attempt for now.

I have found that the "enjoyments" in life are great and needed and worthy of much praise, but it is the difficult tunnels of life where you cannot see the end and sometimes cannot even see God that give us depth and teach us that this earthly journey is just that -- a journey to reach the other side..... It is my experience that shallow people get shallow treatment from God. (He obviously does not see you shallow, especially as of late.....). Through pain and suffering sometimes God raises that curtain between earth and heaven and lets you catch a glimpse of how shallow all of earth's follies are, and how deep and rich the other side is.....And sometimes you get to see and realize what is truly important and what stuff our souls are made of, and what is just chaff. And when you need to turn off the journey for a while, know that we are here to help lift the burden however we can.

So Wes, we truly wish you a happy birthday. Happy - because when you see some of the worst stressers and worst fears that life can throw you, you can still take enjoyment and still breathe deeply the goodness, and still laugh and smile and know your measure.

My love to you -- karen