.jpg)
one of addy's favorite places to go is the polaris mall. NOT b/c she likes shopping. she despises shopping, which hopefully she keeps up through her teenage years! she loves the polaris mall b/c of the indoor playground! so we go there often b/c we live so close & it's just nice to get out of the house & not b/c i necessarily like shopping, either! we were there yesterday morning & then also today....it's a great place to go before it gets busy in the late morning.
this morning, some other mamas really got to me. i call them 'mama bears' ... the ones who hover over their kids making sure they don't do anything that could cause them any sort of enjoyment! even though their kids can walk & talk & run & slide on their own, they feel the need to help them do it. my philosophy is sort of a 'let them learn by natural consequences' & just let them figure it out themselves. it's a PLAYground...let them play!
so there were 3 'mama bears' hovering over their kids who were OLDER than addy. addy is sitting at the bottom of the slide doing her usual sit & stare & wiggle around & roll on the ground at the bottom of the slide. yes, she's blocking the slide, but if the mama bears weren't telling their kids not to go down the slide constantly, another kid would've already gone down the slide & probably run into her, not causing much pain or harm. even if they did cause harm, it's really addy's fault & she's pretty tough anyway. so then these mamas start telling addy 'can you move please, they want to go down the slide.' which probably made addy sit there longer b/c she was trying to focus on figuring out what they were saying! grr. i was about 30 seconds away from going over & nicely explaining that it's okay if their kid goes down the slide & lands on top of addy. lesson learned, right?
it just seems that all these hovering 'bear-like' parents are keeping kids from learning things on their own. learning about social interaction & natural consequences... hhhmmm... just had to post about it, maybe see what others think??!
this morning, some other mamas really got to me. i call them 'mama bears' ... the ones who hover over their kids making sure they don't do anything that could cause them any sort of enjoyment! even though their kids can walk & talk & run & slide on their own, they feel the need to help them do it. my philosophy is sort of a 'let them learn by natural consequences' & just let them figure it out themselves. it's a PLAYground...let them play!
so there were 3 'mama bears' hovering over their kids who were OLDER than addy. addy is sitting at the bottom of the slide doing her usual sit & stare & wiggle around & roll on the ground at the bottom of the slide. yes, she's blocking the slide, but if the mama bears weren't telling their kids not to go down the slide constantly, another kid would've already gone down the slide & probably run into her, not causing much pain or harm. even if they did cause harm, it's really addy's fault & she's pretty tough anyway. so then these mamas start telling addy 'can you move please, they want to go down the slide.' which probably made addy sit there longer b/c she was trying to focus on figuring out what they were saying! grr. i was about 30 seconds away from going over & nicely explaining that it's okay if their kid goes down the slide & lands on top of addy. lesson learned, right?
it just seems that all these hovering 'bear-like' parents are keeping kids from learning things on their own. learning about social interaction & natural consequences... hhhmmm... just had to post about it, maybe see what others think??!
9 comments:
I must confess I have Mama-bear tendancies...but I realize that I sometimes hover too much and back off and let Audrey explore on her own...the hard part is my mind always imagines her smacking her head on whatever it is she's playing with, so I stand near by to "prevent" it from happening. It was good to read your blog and hear the other side...when she's big enough to go to the playground I'll think about your post ")
oh becky! i'm sorry i hope i didn't offend you! egads....these were kids not babies like audrey (seriously, like 4 years old on a 4 foot slide) & i totally understand a need to help out a wee one.
You didn't! Just the opposite, I was impressed with you letting Addy play and explore on her own, but realize that it's hard for me to do with Audrey ")
ok - so would they be called "kelicopter" moms??? (couldn't stop myself, sorry)
Since you asked...You may find this a bit of a surprise
I am actually border line mama bear too I think. I know that if some kid was at the bottom of the slide, and my little guy was at the top...I would not let him go down. I wouldn't want the girl on the bottom to get hurt on my account...especially if I was just standing there as it all unfolds. Some kids just arent as tough as Addy. I guess I think of it this way...when I am not around, will I want my little guy to think that it is ok to go down on the slide if someone is at the bottom? Probably not. I guess it is about those social rules for me.
I still love you. :)
hhmmmm... says heidi. i guess this means elliott won't be allowed to play with amelia?! & if millie is not so tough, i will be there off in the sidelines to give her kisses & hugs & hope that the perpetrating kid's mama will get him or her to apologize.
no way am i a mama bear. i plop down and read a book. no one ever walks away with a bloody nose or broken bone. i mean the play area is for them to roam and explore. it's safe, contained, a place for them to learn interactions and physically explore their abilities. that's my take on it.
Mama bear wants her porridge.
Post a Comment